• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Crunchi Shop
  • Etsy Shop
  • Nav Social Menu

    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • Pinterest
  • Home
  • About
  • Contact
  • Toxin Free
    • Beauty
    • Cleaning
    • Healthy Eating
    • Healthy Lifestyle
    • Women’s Health
  • Healthy Recipes
    • Gluten Free
    • Dairy Free
    • Desserts
    • Snacks
  • Shop
    • Crunchi Shop
    • Etsy Shop
Simply Sarena

Simply Sarena

Home | Blog | Unattainable Dreams???

Unattainable Dreams???

Blog

Last night was the 5th time I’ve been in finals for a team, my 4th finals show, and my 11th pro cheer audition overall in the DC area. Not to toot my own horn, but I know I’m good. I know I’m good enough to be on any of these teams. But like the story of my life, I’m never noticed enough…I’m always overlooked. I’m the girl that always tries so hard and works so hard for what I want and I never get it. People see how hard I try. I’m constantly hearing “this is your year”, “the team needs blondes this year”, “you’ve tried out so many times, it’s definitely your turn”, etc. It’s never my turn…

Just to preface this, I’ve had self-esteem and self-confidence issues ever since I was about 13.  I had terrible cystic acne all through high school and into my early 20’s. I was extremely shy as well and I didn’t want anyone to look at me because I was so embarrassed of my skin. I would look at the floor when I walked (which has affected my posture to this day…I’m trying really hard to correct it), I wouldn’t look people in the eye when I talked either. Because I was so insecure in high school, I only had about 3 friends, I would eat lunch by myself if my lunch time wasn’t with one of my 3 friends, I kept a stash of movies in my backpack and would go to my math teachers classroom during free periods and watch my movies (because I didn’t have anyone to hang out with), and I was an easy target for bullies (aka, other super insecure people who tried to make others’ lives miserable to feel better about themselves.)

Due to all of this, the fact that I’ve been able to audition for these pro cheer teams blows my mind. I’ve come so far and I’m so proud of the person I’ve become. You literally would not think high school me, and 2019 me are the same person. I’ve been able to get up on stage in a bikini and give a speech (twice), I’ve had the opportunity to perform in front of thousands of people at some of the most well-known venues in the DC area (Capital One Arena, The Fillmore Silver Spring, and MGM just to name a few), and I’ve become friends with some of the most incredible, powerful, amazing women this world has to offer. I’ve gained so much from auditioning and I don’t regret chasing this dream for one second.

I’m not going to lie though…it’s been really difficult to see girls I’ve become so close with get on teams and I don’t. Don’t get me wrong, I’m so proud of them and excited that their hard work has all paid off, but a (large) part of me can’t help but get jealous. Why hasn’t my hard work paid off? Why hasn’t my resilience paid off? What am I doing so wrong that no one will tell me I’m doing wrong that’s preventing me from making it? I’ve been auditioning since I was 19 and I’m about to be 27 in less than a month. I’m tired, I’m burnt out, I’m emotionally drained, and my wallet is drained (auditioning’s expensive y’all).

The thing is though, my heart wants this so bad but my mind is questioning if it’s time to hang up my boots. Is this dream just unattainable for me? Is it foolish to keep putting in the work and spending the money if making a team is just not in the cards for me? How do other girls who make the decision to quit working towards their goals figure out this is not for them?

And the thing that’s probably most upsetting is that Cj and I were obviously talking about getting married in the (very) near future and starting a family. I remember we were having a conversation about it in fall of 2017. After his nephew was born, he was starting to get baby fever real bad. I told him I need one more year of auditioning and if I don’t make a team, I’ll be done and we can move on with our life together. I can’t help but think if he was here, I’d probably be married or at least planning a wedding, I could be pregnant, my life would be going down a completely different path but I’d be so happy with it. I also, wouldn’t have endured the disappointment of not making the team this time. But again, that dream wasn’t in the cards for me either. My dream to marry and have a life with my best friend was taken away from me as well. I didn’t have a choice about that dream though.

I’m beginning to wonder if all my dreams are completely unattainable and I just need to find something better to do. I wish God would give me an obvious sign to tell me what I should do because if he’s dropping hints, they’re going way over my head. And there’s really no good ending to this story…sometimes, I just need somewhere to vent and get my thoughts out…

But I really am happy for all my friends who made the team last night and I’m so excited to see them living their dreams out on the field. And I especially want to give a shout out to my girl Kaitlin…she’s been resilient and hasn’t given up and this is finally her year and I’m so excited to see her kill it!

April 6, 2019 · 1 Comment

Previous Post: « One Year Down, The Rest of My Life To Go…
Next Post: How I’m Staying Healthy During the Coronavirus Outbreak…and Flu Season »

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Recipe Rating




This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Comments

  1. A friend says

    April 15, 2019 at 10:43 pm

    Hey, keep your head up Sarena. I remember you from highschool, we rode the bus together but never really talked. I’ve only recently been checking up on some people I remembered from school and saw your blog posts. I read through some of your posts and it seems like you are doing everything right. Keep pushing. Keep auditioning. There’s no need to give up on your dream job just yet. Think about all you’ve done to turn things around over the past decade and how much further you can go.

    Reply

Primary Sidebar

HI EVERYONE!

I’m Sarena


I’m a Northern Virginia based Integrative Nutrition Coach, a Toxin Free Lifestyle enthusiast, a dancer, and a dog mom to my sweet girl, Miss Cammie.

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Pinterest

Search by Category

simply.sarena

So many women suffer every month from debilitating So many women suffer every month from debilitating period cramps. The conventional way of treating them actually makes the problem worse!

❌Birth Control covers up the symptoms because you don’t get a real period. Meanwhile, whatever is causing the cramps in the first place is still going on in the body and probably getting worse! Birth Control does not treat cramps…it only hides the problem!

❌Ibuprofen may help in a pinch but it doesn’t treat what is actually causing the cramps in the first place. Also, ibuprofen is really bad for gut health (and poor gut health could also be a cause of cramps) so you could be making the problem worse!

❌A lot of women turn to junk food on their period however, junk food is inflammatory so if your cramps are caused by inflammation, you could be making the problem worse! If you’re craving chocolate, you probably need magnesium, so if you’re going to eat it, eat good quality DARK chocolate! 

The biggest favor you can do yourself is listen to your body and figure out what is causing the issues in the first place! The answer is different for everyone and there is no one size fits all solution!

Feel free to DM me if you need any support! 

.
.
.
.
.
.
#womenshealth #periodcramps #periodcrampsrelief #nontoxicliving #lowtoxlife #lowtoxliving #hormonehealth #hormonehealthcoach #womenshormones #hormonal #hormonalimbalance #hormonalimbalances #nutritionforhormones #nutritioncoach #healthandnutrition #holistichealth #holistichealthtips #periodtips #periodproblems #periodpositive #periodpain
Sugar gets such a bad reputation, but not all suga Sugar gets such a bad reputation, but not all sugar is bad!!!

Natural sugar is necessary because it gives us energy! You can find natural sugar in fruits, vegetables, and sweeteners like raw honey, pure maple syrup, dates, coconut sugar, and more.

Watch out for sneaky sugars in processed food as they cause blood sugar spikes which gives us that instant energy but we crash. It also causes type 2 diabetes and insulin issues. 

When you’re reading the ingredient label on food, watch out for different (not so obvious) names for sugar. 

Just because something says 12g of sugar doesn’t mean that 12g is bad sugar…which is why you always need to check the ingredient label for the source of the sugar!

Also, people think Stevia is healthier which isn’t necessarily the case. Stevia is highly processed and should only be consumed occasionally unless you’re consuming stevia in its purest form! 

.
.
.
.
.
#addedsugar #naturalsugar #stevia #holistichealth #holisticnutrition #sneakysugar #ingredientlabels #ingredientsmatter #lowtoxlifestyle #lowtoxdiet #sugarfree #sugarfreediet #sugarfreelifestyle #nontoxicliving #healthyeatinghabits #healthyeatingtips #sugartips #nutritioncoaching #nutritionfacts #nutritiontip
Birth Control does NOT cure a hormone imbalance!!! Birth Control does NOT cure a hormone imbalance!!! Birth Control hides the symptoms of a hormone imbalance, meanwhile the problem is getting worse.

A lot of women struggle with severe symptoms when they come off birth control because they never addressed the underlying cause of their hormone imbalance.

If you are struggling with hormonal acne, period cramps, severe PMS, mood swings, etc. and you think birth control is going to fix the problem, it will not!

There are a lot of factors that can cause a hormone imbalance from our diet, to hormone disrupting chemicals in our daily products, to external factors like stress, lack of sleep, etc. that can throw our hormones out of whack!

If you need support with your hormones, feel free to DM me!

.
.
.
.
.
.
#hormonehealth #hormonehealthcoach #lowtoxlife #lowtoxlifestyle #crunchyblogger #holistichealthcoach #holistichealthandwellness #womenshealth #womenshealthmatters #womenshealthtips #womenshormonehealth #birthcontrolproblems #birthcontrolpills #birthcontrol #holistichealthcoaching #naturallivingideas #naturallifestyle #naturallivingtips #healthtipsforwomen #pcoslifestyle #hormoneimbalance #hormoneimbalances
Our bodies and hormones are so complex! If you’r Our bodies and hormones are so complex! If you’re eating right, limiting toxin exposure, and still can’t seem to get your hormones under control, it could be a different lifestyle factor coming into play!

We are not men, we do not have the same 24 hour hormone cycle that men have.

We have different needs for different times during the month! Being in tune with your body and doing what it needs at that time is so important!

.
.
.
.
.
#hormonehealth #womenshealth #womenshormones #holistichealthandwellness #lowtoxlifestyle #toxinfreeliving #healthandwellnesscoach #healthandwellnesstips #birthcontrolproblems #birthcontrol #regulatehormonesnaturally #hormoneimbalance #womenslifestyle
These are foods that have been marketed to be heal These are foods that have been marketed to be healthy, but they’re not. There’s so many other actually healthy foods you could eat that are much more satisfying than these. Keep reading for why these aren’t the best options!

❌Whole Wheat Bread: This one comes down to the ingredients. One popular whole wheat bread contains Soybean Oil, Soy Lecithin, and Natural Flavors. Also because I have a gluten sensitivity, eating slices of any bread is a no for me!

❌Cereal: So many cereal’s are full of sugar and synthetic vitamins which are not properly absorbed by our bodies, not to mention artificial colors and flavors. Also, a lot of cereal has extremely high levels of glyphosate! Not a great way to start your day.

❌Flavored Yogurt: Any yogurt except plain yogurt has a lot of sugar. You’ll also find natural flavors and gums in some popular brands. Natural flavors is an easy way for companies to not disclose all ingredients and gums can cause digestive issues. In my opinion, you may as well have a bowl of ice cream and enjoy it than try to be “healthy” with flavored yogurt.

❌Farmed Salmon: You may think you’re making a healthy choice by choosing salmon however, farmed salmon should be avoided as it is basically big agricultures version of salmon. It is bred in crammed cages, fed an unnatural diet of fish meal & animal by products, and they are full of pesticides and antibiotics 🤢

❌Granola Bars: Granola bars are full of a lot of sugar including corn syrup. You may also find soybean oil or canola oil which are inflammatory, and natural flavors. You’re better off baking some cookies and knowing exactly what you’re putting in the cookies. 

Did any of these surprise you?? Let me know in the comments! 

.
.
.
.
.
#healthyeatinghabits #unhealthyfood #lowtox #lowtoxlife #crunchygirl #holisticnutritioncoach #iinhealthcoach #iinalumni #iingrad #toxinfreeliving #nutritiontips #nutritionfacts #eathealthybehealthy #healthychoices #foodismedicine #dontbefooled #biggovsucks #biggovermentsucks #healyourselfnaturally #healyourselfwithfood
I’ve had so many women reach out to me lately ab I’ve had so many women reach out to me lately about wanting to get off birth control, but they’re scared how it will effect their body.

The truth is, if you got on birth control for bad period cramps, hormonal acne, irregular periods, etc., birth control was covering up the problem…not fixing it!

When you go off birth control, you’ll probably find you’ll have the same problems of not worse.

That’s why balancing your hormones is so important when coming off birth control!

These 3 tips are a great place to start! There are so many different things you can do to get your hormones in check. 

Follow for more holistic health & nutrition tips!

.
.
.
.
.
#postbirthcontrolsyndrome #getoffbirthcontrol #hormonehealth #hormonehealthcoach #saynotobirthcontrol #womenshealthcoach #womenshealthmatters #womenshealthtips #womenshealthandwellness #womenshealthadvocate
✨Make sure you save this recipe for later!✨ T ✨Make sure you save this recipe for later!✨

These are the BEST healthy peanut butter chocolate chip cookies 🍪 

Recipe: 

1 egg
1 cup of peanut butter
1/2 cup coconut sugar
1/4 cup ground flaxseed
1/2 tsp aluminum free baking powder
3/4 cup dark chocolate chips (make sure you check the ingredient label and only use clean chocolate chips!)

Bake at 350 degrees Fahrenheit for 8-10 minutes!

Let me know if you give these a try! 

#healthydessertrecipes #glutenfreecookies #refinedsugarfree #bakingreel #holisticnutrition #hormonefriendly #womenshealth #womenshormones
It’s still January for a few more days! Last y It’s still January for a few more days! 

Last year, I did a lot that wasn’t working for me. I got so stuck in my routines, I was saying “yes” to everything, even if I didn’t want to, because I didn’t want to offend anyone.

This year, I’m only doing things that light me up and that are in alignment with my goals 💕✨

Health isn’t just about what we eat and the products we use, it’s also about how everything else in our life makes us feel and effects our physical health.

At the end of 2022, I realized I needed to make a change when I was starting to get headaches almost daily again. I had also spent soooo much money it makes me sick thinking about it.

No more! I’m putting myself and my goals first this year! 

#newyearnewme #2023goals #freshstart #holistichealth #holisticwellnesscoach
I ALWAYS have these 5 tea’s on hand 🍵 Green I ALWAYS have these 5 tea’s on hand 🍵

Green Tea: Contains caffeine so it gives me energy. Green Tea is also high in antioxidants!

Echinacea Tea: Has immune supporting properties. It’s even known to shorten symptoms of colds and the flu!

Dandelion Tea: This tea is a powerful liver detox! It also has anti-inflammatory properties.

Raspberry Leaf Tea: This tea is great for a woman’s cycle. It’s high in magnesium and vitamin B6 so it helps relieve PMS symptoms and helps regulate hormones.

Chaga Tea: Chaga is the king of medicinal mushrooms. It’s full of antioxidants and has anti-inflammatory properties. It helps regulate blood sugar and blood pressure, it boosts the immune system, and it may even slow the growth of c**cer cells. Literally the KING! 

My favorite brands of tea are @yogitea, @tradmedicinals, and @numiorganictea. These brands have organic teas and their tea bags are plastic free!
Follow on Instagram
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms & Conditions
  • Disclaimer/Disclosure

Copyright © 2023 · Farmhouse Theme by Restored 316